For Bobby and I, the story of how we came to understand our life purpose was unique. It happened for me on March 24, 2010. After spending months in my closet, seeking and asking and crying and praising, He answered me. In the middle of the night, my purpose began to unfold as I was introduced to a country that I knew nothing about. Mongolia. It's amazing how one word can change your life in an instant. But as the picture flashed across the screen in my mind, I knew something big was happening. He was revealing it. This yearning I had been feeling in the very depths of my being was finally being fulfilled.
It may not have been what I was expecting, or even hoping for, but it was the dream that He was entrusting to me, and I could not take it lightly. Even as I sought to push it aside, thinking that it would be crazy to cling to such a thought, I knew that this was the beginning of a "new thing" [Isaiah 43:19]. I knew that what was "springing forth" was not of my own accord. It was something so great and beyond my understanding, that I could not claim it as my own. It was most certainly HIS doing. And that is what makes my story unique and precious. My story belongs to the One who continues to hold my life in His hands. The One who formed me in my mother's womb. The One who created the universe with His words. His creativity is vast, yet so specific.
Through the process of confirmation, I was full of questions (as I usually am), doubts, excitement, and concern. I had to process through and surrender a whole lot of insecurity and fear. The very last thing that I thought would be a part of my life, was the very thing that the Lord was asking me to step into by faith. How could I possibly do something that seemed so brave? I was that shy kid who didn't have the courage to get on a roller coaster, or jump off a small cliff. I had a legitimate fear of being left alone, and got homesick when I was away for a week! How could I possibly give up everything that was comfortable and normal, and move to a far away land, so different from my own? It seemed beyond crazy.
But that's how it is with the Lord. Sometimes He asks us to do things that are so far from what we could every conceive in our mind, in order to reveal our need for Him. You see, without that dream, I would have never believed that this was what He had for me. I would have continued to believe that I was called to live a fairly normal life, ministering in a local fellowship. There is nothing wrong with that, except the fact that it wouldn't be His purpose!! Whether we are called to our neighborhood, or the other side of the world, we must be obedient and willing to step out in faith. Sometimes it requires us to do something as scary as stepping out of a boat to attempt walking on water. We may see a storm of what could be, but when we fix our eyes on the One calling us out, we can be certain that He will not let us drown.
Looking back, I cannot imagine my life any other way. After accepting my purpose, I spent a summer in Cambodia, which completely changed my take on living and working overseas. I absolutely fell in love with the people I was working with, and Asia in general. It was a pivotal time in my walk with the Lord, because it was when I officially accepted this calling, and decided that I absolutely could not do anything else. This was what I was made for. This desire and purpose continued to grow, as I walked through the open door to serve in the Philippines for one year. I learned how to actually live in a new context. I made lifelong connections, that actually helped to get me to Mongolia. As I was at home, preparing to move to Mongolia, I met a group of people who also had a burden for this nation. In that group, was a guy named Bobby, who, even in his complete openness, was a mystery to me. I had no idea how to take him at first. Was this guy for real? Or was he just saying that "everything [I] just said was [his] favorite thing to do...every day" (if you haven't seen Nacho Libre, you should). After several months, I finally began to recognize that the Lord was doing something in our friendship, and that Bobby, was in fact, walking in the same direction as me-- even if his path looked a little different from mine.
Although I would soon be moving 7,000 miles away, we knew that the Lord would work out all of the details. Bobby was in Mongolia for two overlapping months, and during that time, was able to meet with my leadership, who gave him their blessing and permission to propose around Christmas, when I would be visiting home. Even the smallest of details were taken care of. We got engaged on November 24, 2014, I planned a wedding from the other side of the world, came home in the summer of 2015, and we got married on September 26, 2015. I cannot believe how quickly time as flown. We spent the first few months acclimating to marriage, then began making preparations to move overseas. We had one plan in mind, but in time, realized that the Lord had a different plan for us. He did the work, and provided more than what we had need of in the process!
Sometimes, it is absolutely necessary to look back and remember His faithfulness. Whether we are walking through victories, or the most difficult of trials, we need the simple reminder that He is faithful. That truly does work "all things together for good" [Romans 8:28]. That he cares about the little things. And that He desires our obedience.
This is my faith story.
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