sacrifice.

Last night, we read a devotion entitled, "Sacrifice: Climb Onto the Altar" in the LiveDead Journal. [If you have never read LD, you should really check it out.] In this particular challenge, the writer makes the point that Abraham was not the only one who had to make a sacrifice. Isaac willingly got on the altar, in obedience to his father, who was acting out of obedience to the Father. "Isaac had to willingly lie on the altar and trust his father." This really struck a cord with me, as I sometimes feel like I am being sacrificed because of obedience to a call. Romans 12:1 says, "I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of [Him], to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to [Him], which is your [reasonable] worship." It is our duty, our responsibility, our worship, to be living sacrifices. To put to death our flesh, and to walk according to the Spirit in obedience.

Something that is often hard to express on a grand scale is the act of giving up that which is considered "normal" in our society. Before we picked up our newlywed life and moved it overseas, I struggled. Yes, I knew I was called to live my life overseas. Yes, I loved being in Asia. Yes, I had lived overseas two separate years of my life as a young, single woman (which wasn't easy). But this time, it was an even greater challenge to give up the comforts of "home". This time, it seemed as though I was giving up so much more than any time before. I was saying goodbye to the same city, the same fellowship, the same people (in fact, one less than I said goodbye to last time 😊), only this time, I was giving up my "normal" newlywed life, and everything that entailed.

When Bobby and I began our relationship, we knew that we would one day serve overseas. This wasn't a question for either of us because we were confident that the Father had brought us together, and that He had a plan for us in this calling as husband and wife. We were 7,000 miles apart throughout most of our dating relationship and engagement, so when I returned home, we got married and immediately decided to start the process of preparing to return to Asia. During those first few months, it seemed a daunting task, so we put off the process until after the new year, in order to get used to married life. Those early months were really difficult for me. I felt as though I was on a pendulum, swinging from feelings of excitement to despair when I thought about our future. On one hand, I was eager to see what the Father had in store for our future overseas. I would finally be able to serve alongside a lifelong partner, who could share the burdens and struggles of life in a new context. Still, on the other hand, I feared what giving up the early years of marriage in America would look like. Just how much would I be leaving behind? At the time, it felt like everything.

Everyone else who was newly married or soon-to-be married seemed to be in the process of buying houses, trading their cars in for newer ones, working towards promotions, or planning out when and how they wanted to start having kids. But us...we were living in the ghetto (getting robbed), using hand-me-down furniture, putting off getting internet at our apartment for as long as possible, working, and preparing to leave all of our new household items behind to move to a third world country. Trying to explain that to most couples our age made me feel like I had lost my mind.

Talk about feeling AB-normal!

Then the questions came.

Don't you want to settle down first- or wait until you have kids? 

Wouldn't you rather go somewhere closer? 

Or, as we were ending our lease, So... Are you buying a house?!? 

No. No. No.

No, I don't want to settle down. Well, sometimes, I do...but I know I will never be able to dig out those roots of comfort later. The time is now. We love kids, and want lots of them. People have babies overseas, every single day, and raise those babies overseas. We can too! :)

No, I would rather not go, than to go anywhere outside of His will. When you are called to a specific place, to do a specific task, there is no where else that you can go and feel at ease!

And no, we aren't buying a house. We will likely never own a house. Sometimes it feels like we're missing out, but deep down, I really don't think we are.

While I know these questions are asked out of kindness and concern, it still does not change the fact that it makes me feel as though what we are doing is less than what everyone else is doing with their lives. To see people buying beautiful homes, nice clothes, and amazing household items...that's the stuff of dreams to me. I love shopping. I love decorating. I love new things. But, I have decided that, even some of the greatest things that my wonderful home country has to offer, are not going to hold me back from this dream that has been placed in my heart by the Giver of dreams. My assignment is to go, reach, and win for His sake. And I believe, "It's gonna be worth it all"! Because, in the end, what is done for eternity is all that will matter.

I say all of this, not to make others feel like their sacrifice means less to the Father, or to make others feel as though they aren't making an impact where they are! In fact, I feel the opposite. If you know you are called to be where you are at, then I rejoice with you! Just as so many people have rejoiced with us in this process! I believe sacrifice comes in many different forms. It could mean that you put your life on the line to save others' lives, that you are successful in your job for the purpose of sending others out, that you are leading a flock of believers who will go to places that you could never get to, that you are interceding for your neighbors, or that you are making a difference in the lives of your coworkers. Whatever your sacrifice is, let it be pleasing to the One who has called you out of darkness and into His marvelous light...in order that you might shed light in the midst of darkness. And let us not compare our sacrifices to those around us. We each play a part in this great plan, and each of us are gifted and skilled to do a specific task.

To quote LD in their challenge: "How have you defined sacrifice? Is it always suffering physical death or cultural distance from your family? Where are you getting your love, your respect, your acceptance? Are you willing to give those things to the Master? What is easy for you may be a sacrifice for another. Are you measuring your sacrifice by what is hard for someone else? Are you willing to be the sacrifice (as opposed to making it)?"

Sending a Box?

Several people have asked us about sending packages, and suggested that we develop a list of items that we need or cannot get here in Laos! We want to let you know that it is quite expensive to send a box to Laos and it is important to get tracking, but surprisingly, they get here rather quickly and are a huge blessing! We will add more to this list as time goes on.


Crest Toothpaste
TRESemme Flawless Curls Mousse (+ setting spray, gel)
Shaving cream
Deodorant (Men's Degree: Everest)
Band-Aids
Hydrogen Peroxide
**Other toiletry items (they just aren't the same here)
Real vanilla extract
Flavored creamers (pumpkin, almond joy, caramel, italian cream)
Cereal (Cracklin Oat Bran, Cinnamon Toast Crunch, etc)
Candy (Sour Patch Kids, Hot Tamales, Sweetarts, original Twizzlers, etc)
Any kind of boxed cake/muffin/brownie mix is a nice treat
Pepperoni (for homemade pizza!)
Tone's Chicken Base 16oz. / Better Than Boullion
Beef Jerkey
Protein bars
Candles (pumpkin, Christmas, vanilla, etc)
Scented hand sanitizers / hand soaps
Pumpkin pie spice
Essential Oils (Plant Therapy, Young Living, or DoTerra)
Probiotics
**Anything seasonal (decorations, food, napkins, craft items for Christmas)
**Specific clothing items


THANK YOU for you generosity and thoughtfulness!

faith story.

It is still hard to believe how quickly everything came together for us to get where we are today. Sometimes, I still cannot believe that I am back in Asia...and this time, with a husband! The Father sure does have a way of surprising us, doesn't he?

For Bobby and I, the story of how we came to understand our life purpose was unique. It happened for me on March 24, 2010. After spending months in my closet, seeking and asking and crying and praising, He answered me. In the middle of the night, my purpose began to unfold as I was introduced to a country that I knew nothing about. Mongolia. It's amazing how one word can change your life in an instant. But as the picture flashed across the screen in my mind, I knew something big was happening. He was revealing it. This yearning I had been feeling in the very depths of my being was finally being fulfilled. 

It may not have been what I was expecting, or even hoping for, but it was the dream that He was entrusting to me, and I could not take it lightly. Even as I sought to push it aside, thinking that it would be crazy to cling to such a thought, I knew that this was the beginning of a "new thing" [Isaiah 43:19]. I knew that what was "springing forth" was not of my own accord. It was something so great and beyond my understanding, that I could not claim it as my own. It was most certainly HIS doing. And that is what makes my story unique and precious. My story belongs to the One who continues to hold my life in His hands. The One who formed me in my mother's womb. The One who created the universe with His words. His creativity is vast, yet so specific. 

Through the process of confirmation, I was full of questions (as I usually am), doubts, excitement, and concern. I had to process through and surrender a whole lot of insecurity and fear. The very last thing that I thought would be a part of my life, was the very thing that the Lord was asking me to step into by faith. How could I possibly do something that seemed so brave? I was that shy kid who didn't have the courage to get on a roller coaster, or jump off a small cliff. I had a legitimate fear of being left alone, and got homesick when I was away for a week! How could I possibly give up everything that was comfortable and normal, and move to a far away land, so different from my own? It seemed beyond crazy. 

But that's how it is with the Lord. Sometimes He asks us to do things that are so far from what we could every conceive in our mind, in order to reveal our need for Him. You see, without that dream, I would have never believed that this was what He had for me. I would have continued to believe that I was called to live a fairly normal life, ministering in a local fellowship. There is nothing wrong with that, except the fact that it wouldn't be His purpose!! Whether we are called to our neighborhood, or the other side of the world, we must be obedient and willing to step out in faith. Sometimes it requires us to do something as scary as stepping out of a boat to attempt walking on water. We may see a storm of what could be, but when we fix our eyes on the One calling us out, we can be certain that He will not let us drown. 

Looking back, I cannot imagine my life any other way. After accepting my purpose, I spent a summer in Cambodia, which completely changed my take on living and working overseas. I absolutely fell in love with the people I was working with, and Asia in general. It was a pivotal time in my walk with the Lord, because it was when I officially accepted this calling, and decided that I absolutely could not do anything else. This was what I was made for. This desire and purpose continued to grow, as I walked through the open door to serve in the Philippines for one year. I learned how to actually live in a new context. I made lifelong connections, that actually helped to get me to Mongolia. As I was at home, preparing to move to Mongolia, I met a group of people who also had a burden for this nation. In that group, was a guy named Bobby, who, even in his complete openness, was a mystery to me. I had no idea how to take him at first. Was this guy for real? Or was he just saying that "everything [I] just said was [his] favorite thing to do...every day" (if you haven't seen Nacho Libre, you should). After several months, I finally began to recognize that the Lord was doing something in our friendship, and that Bobby, was in fact, walking in the same direction as me-- even if his path looked a little different from mine. 

Although I would soon be moving 7,000 miles away, we knew that the Lord would work out all of the details. Bobby was in Mongolia for two overlapping months, and during that time, was able to meet with my leadership, who gave him their blessing and permission to propose around Christmas, when I would be visiting home. Even the smallest of details were taken care of. We got engaged on November 24, 2014, I planned a wedding from the other side of the world, came home in the summer of 2015, and we got married on September 26, 2015. I cannot believe how quickly time as flown. We spent the first few months acclimating to marriage, then began making preparations to move overseas. We had one plan in mind, but in time, realized that the Lord had a different plan for us. He did the work, and provided more than what we had need of in the process! 

Sometimes, it is absolutely necessary to look back and remember His faithfulness. Whether we are walking through victories, or the most difficult of trials, we need the simple reminder that He is faithful. That truly does work "all things together for good" [Romans 8:28]. That he cares about the little things. And that He desires our obedience. 

This is my faith story. 

fresh beginnings.

I have always loved writing. Even at a young, I remember wanting to document every detail of my life in my diaries. That quickly developed into prayer journaling, which then grew into a love of writing, no matter the subject (for the most part). While I have slacked in this department for quite some time now (and during some of the biggest moments of my life!), I have decided that it is time to re-establish the wonderful discipline of blogging. I created a brand new site for this brand new season in mine and Bobby's life.

I don't really care who reads my blog, and honestly, it is not likely that I will share my posts on social media often, but for those who are following our journey in Asia, here it is...